Review – Jason Aldean’s “Lights Come On”

Jason Aldean Lights Come On

It’s 2016 and Jason Aldean is still producing absolute shit. One of the things that has allowed Aldean to not only survive, but thrive for so long is his chameleon-like ability to flawlessly appeal to the current popular sound. At the same time he sprinkles in just enough quality on his album cuts to make you not completely hate him. In other words, he perfectly plays the audience. It says a lot when he only made the round of 16 in our Worst Country Artist Tournament, when this is an artist who helped introduce rap to the genre and cranked out bro country with glee. Once upon a time Aldean was a solid artist. Then he went to rap country then bro country then metro bro and now he’s back to making rock music that sounds like country with his new single, “Lights Come On.”

I said above that Aldean loves to appeal to what’s popular, but he doesn’t do that with “Lights Come On” because I don’t hear any club beats or something disco-y. That being said it still isn’t country music. This is just pure arena rock. The blaring guitars and the loud drums populate this song throughout. It’s like a bad Brantley Gilbert from five years ago. As for what the song is about and what it’s trying to say….I got nothing. This song doesn’t say anything. It’s just a bunch of words thrown together with the loud production and Aldean’s boring vocals. I find it hard to focus to even listen to the song, as it just bores me to tears. Just look at the chorus:

When the lights come on, everybody’s screaming
Lighters in the sky, yeah, everybody’s singing
Every word to every song to a girl to take it home tonight
When the lights come on, everybody’s feeling
A hallelujah high from the floor to the ceiling
Yeah, the drink that we’re drinking, the smoke that we’re smoking
The party we throw, it’s going all night long
When the lights come on
When the lights come on

If any of you are up to it, please let me know in the comments what exactly the theme is here. And how many writers did it take to write these genius lyrics? If you’re answer is 6, you’re right. The team of Jimmy Robbins, Jordan Schmidt, Brad Warren, Brett Warren and Florida Georgia Line wrote these lyrics. How in the hell does it take six people to write lines like this:

You’re a crack-of-dawn, Monday-morning, coffee strong
Poured everything you got into a paycheck Friday night
You’re a Powerstroke diesel, backhoe-riding king of beers, 18-wheeler
Driving, living life in between the lines
Of clocking in and quitting time

There’s nothing else to say about a song that has nothing to say. “Lights Come On” is just noise that fills space, nothing more and nothing less. There is absolutely nothing fulfilling or moving about this song. It’s sole purpose was to net radio play and endorsement deals from the likes of Bass Pro Shops and Pepsi. This is worse than terrible music because at least terrible music makes me feel rage and anger. I just want to passively loathe Aldean more after hearing this. But hey I’m sure Aldean fans will love this after drinking about ten overpriced beers at some overpriced music festival this summer. “Lights Come On” is the equivalent of a light, nagging headache. Just avoid it or have some aspirin on-hand after hearing this song.

Grade: 0/10